Bleach gone crazy
by NotYoloEnough4
Summary: When OOC is too much. Warnings: yaoi, critical scenes, might be some violence too. I don't own Bleach, TK does.
1. Chapter 1

First chapter

,,Oi, Ishida!" Ichigo shouted as he tried to reach the quincy who apparently pretended to ignore him. They were in a supermarket where the orange haired boy was momentarily shopping. He was examining a broccoli when the shinigami noticed him; he struggled if catch up to him or not, and then he decided to do so, since their friendship wasn't the smoothest of all. Ichigo already tried to get closer to the nerd but he was too much of a loner to join his social life. His friends were the gang. The list ends here.

,,Ishida, you bastard!" the orange haired teen murmured while running towards the other who finally seemed to notice him.

,,Why didn't you answer? Am I this embarrassing?" the shinigami impeached the quincy.

,,Sorry, but do we know each other?" he asked in an oddly surprised tone.

,,Of course, baka! It's me, Ichigo! Did you lose your memory, or what? Aren't you Ishida Uryu?" he just noticed the black haired guy wasn't wearing his glasses. If he had, he would most certainly push them up with his fingers now.

,,No, I'm Ishida Youkina, actually."

* * *

,,What the fuck? He has a damn twin brother and he didn't tell me yet?" Ichigo and his new 'friend' were walking out of the supermarket. Youkina was more shy and innocent than Ishida and he didn't wear glasses, this was enough for Ichigo to make a difference.

,,Are you two this confident? Are you his boyfriend or something?" the new arrival asked in the most innocent tone.

,,OF COURSE NOT! Man, do I look this gay?" the shorter boy looked as he felt really guilty.

,,Sorry for hurting you! I didn't mean it!" Ichigo thought he was just about to cry.

,,No problem... But where did you get this idea? Is your brother gay?"

,,Well, I just thought about it because Ishida isn't really outgoing so if you think it's so natural for him to tell you about his own matters, you must be someone really special for him. But it looks like I'm mistaken, sorry." Youkina smiled. This still shocked Ichigo; it was like seeing Ishida standing in front of him and saying all this stuff.

,,By the way, wanna come to my place?" the orange haired shinigami felt the sudden urge to make some friends and this guy was just so much better than the well-known quincy; personality and looks too -he didn't wear those annoying glasses after all. Youkina looked like the corrected version of Ishida and this amused Ichigo a lot; he bet this would make his grumpy teammate feel useless.

* * *

Fortunately there was no one home so our protagonist didn't have to explain his weird family to the new guy. He told him about his mother, though. Youkina also narrated how they got separated with Ishida to keep up the quincy race in different places. When Ichigo revealed his shinigami identity the black haired boy laughed and told him he already knew. He lived with his distantly related cognates in Ireland in a small village or something like that. He decided to reunite with his brother though, so he returned to Japan. They had a long chat about various topics and Youkina really seemed to enjoy himself. After some hours, already in Ichigo's room he suddenly said:

,,You're being really nice with me, Ichigo-kun! Thank you."

,,You're welcome, but this is just normal. Is Ishida treating you like shit, or what?"

,,Well, that's not the kindest way to say it... Let's say he was a bit too... Fair." the teen arched his eyebrows.

,,What do you mean 'too fair'?"

,,I came to Karakura town two days ago and I immediately went to the hospital to meet Ishida. I rung the bell and he opened the door. I told him everything and when I asked if I could stay at his place for a while he told that when they parted us they had some reasons and... kicked me out." the guy started sobbing at the last part.

,,Oh damn. That asshole." Ichigo said when he saw the Youkina was crying like a newborn baby. He started thinking how the hell could a guy be this weird. Even Inoue wouldn't weep over something like that; if not else, it made him mad. He wanted to have a word with Ishida immediately.

,,Come, we're gonna talk with him. I can't believe he's such a douchebag without any reason; if we don't find any other solution, you'll stay at my place." the quincy's twin's eyes got all sparkly.

,,Thank you so much, Ichigo-kun!"

* * *

**Author's notes: This piece is a part of a project I'm currently working on, called PAMOOCAYC (Put As Much OOC As You Can). The stories and idiotic facts will of course be connected by logic, like OOC-writers often do. This will be a perfect parody of everything which is not worth being called a fanfiction. Kind of short for first chapter, I know. But I got inspiration now, so more is coming. **

**If ya want interesting facts, google what Youkina's name means. It's also a spoiler for the rest of the story, so don't do it if ya don't like spoilers.**

**If ya post any kind of review, ya'll die in three days ;P**

**My eyes on ya**

**~NYE**


	2. Chapter 2

Second chapter

Ichigo couldn't understand how the hell did he end up at Inoue Orihime's place after all what happened. He and Youkina were waiting for her to bring the tea in the living room after they found no one at the Ishida Family Hospital. It was rather weird to have a whole hospital empty so the orange haired teen concluded that something Soul Society related had happened. He decided to discuss it with Inoue since he was up to bring Youkina to her place anyway. The naive redhead was the only one who would offer her place without discussion.

,,Tea is ready, Kurosaki-kun, Youkina-kun!" she smiled like a child while bringing in the tray. The scent coming from the teacups was not really reassuring honestly.

,,Thank you very much, it's really tasty, Orihime-chan! You guys are all so kind!" Youkina said after he sipped from his cup. Ichigo reacted in a different way to the same liquid: he almost threw up.

,,It's nothing, Youkina-kun! I'm glad you like it, no one ever told me something like this! Maybe, except for two people..." she looked up like she was trying to remember. Ichigo helped her.

,,Rangiku-san and... who's the second one?" he questioned mostly himself.

,,I'm afraid I can't tell you, Kurosaki-kun... That's a secret!" the shinigami almost spitted the 'tea' out. Since when Inoue had secrets?

,,It's strange only a few people told you... Your tea is very special!" Youkina kept complimenting her.

,,Indeed." Ichigo said, but he meant it another way...

,,But why won't you tell us about the other person? You made me curious now... And Youkina doesn't know him or her, so I'm the only one who has to keep his mouth!" the girl looked at the ground.

,,He told that if I ever told anyone that he actually liked something, he would cut me into really small pieces!" Ichigo's pupils narrowed. He would really like to see this guy, especially if Inoue was dating him. Awkward silence.

,,So..." the orange haired boy tried to bring up another topic ,,Can Youkina stay at your house until I have a talk with that asshole Ishida?"

,,Of course he can, I have many free rooms over here!" she innocently pointed at the doors of her dead parents' and brother.

* * *

**Author's notes: Second chapter... Awh. Turned out a little weird. So, can ya guess who's the other person who likes 'Hime's cooking? You'll get to know, as the story continues. There isn't more OOC in this chap, gotta practice a bit this thing. You'll still die if you dare to post any review. **

**My eyes on ya.**

**~NYE**


	3. Chapter 3

Third chapter

,,He got kidnapped." said a wide mouth with a calm voice from under a white-green striped hat.

,,NANI?" Ichigo shouted as he jumped up and crushed a fist in the table. The phrase before was the answer he got when he asked Urahara about the quincy's location.

,,The Arrancar kidnapped him."

,,Like Inoue? Oh my gosh, they just can't have enough of this game..." the shinigami scratched his head, calm again.

,,By the way, is it still a mistery, how she got back?" Urahara Kisuke stood up too.

,,We're still investigating with Yoruichi... Even though the girl won't tell us anything. She keeps on blabbering about secrets end being cut into pieces, totally nonsense."

,,Now that you say, she mentioned it today, when I tried to leave Youkina at her's..." when the blond haired man made a questioning look, Ichigo told him about the whole story.

,,How silly, if I didn't know the truth, I would think Ishida-kun is just fooling us around!"

,,Anyway, how are we going to get him back? I don't feel like putting all that effort in a mission again, after Rukia's and Inoue's, I had enough of rescues..."

,,Nah, you didn't even rescue Inoue, when you got there she was already gone..." Urahara mocked the boy.

,,Okay, got it. But do you know any better way to brig him back?"

,,Better way than going ourselves? Hmm... I guess there is one..." Ichigo looked curious.

,,We could send someone else!" the orange haired shinigami had had enough, so he went out of the shop and decided to go home.

That day was definitely getting weirder and weirder, what made Ichigo want to sleep for the rest of it. Actually, the strangest thing happened to him when he was right walking home to satisfy his sleeping needs. When he turned around a corner, he suddenly saw something which brought a mental shock to him.

There were a long, red haired guy with tattoos and a short, black haired girl in school uniform leaning against a fence, and yes, they were definitely kissing. Not the eight-year-old school type; they had as much lust and passion to make think they were going to do it right then and there. The shinigami's eyeballs were dropping out.

,,Oi, Ichigo!" they stopped when the girl noticed him.

,,T-Tatsuki..."

,,What's up?"

,,Umm... Nothing... I guess I'm heading home..." Inoue's best friend laughed.

,,Are we making you feel uncomfortable with Ren-Ren? Don't be scared, you already look a lot less manly than him!" the boy almost fainted when he heard how she called Red Pineapple.

,,C'mon, Ichigo, we're not gonna fuck in public, I'm civilized you know... Even though this chick definitely brings my instincts out!" Renji started kissing Tatsuki again. Our protagonist felt his stomach turning around.

,,What's it, Ichigo? You jealous?" the fierce girl laughed when they took a break again.

,,Um well not rea..."

,,Wanna have a turn too?"

,,That's kind of you, Tatsuki, but I'm not quite sure Renji would be happy if I just... You know..."

,,Like I'd ever kiss you, idiot! I mean with Ren-Ren!" she pointed at the redhead as she was really proud of something. Ichigo ran away screaming.

,,WHY DO YOU ALL THINK I'M FRIGGIN' GAY?!"

* * *

**Author's notes: One more chap, yay. I'm forcing myself to put more OOC in this story. I think this TatsuRen was the final blow. Haha, Ichigo doesn't really care about Ishida being kidnapped... Lol. **

**Eyes on ya.**

**~NYE**


	4. Chapter 4

Fourth chapter

Ichigo sat alone at home. His life was turning into nonsense, especially the sudden relationship between Renji and Tatsuki... He almost vomited just by thinking about it. He decided he'd have a cup of tea to calm his nerves down. He boiled some water, took the packet of green tea from the cupboard, poured the leaves into the pot...

CRASH! The door of the Kurosaki maison fell on the floor with several wall pieces. And two suspicious individuals walked in, one without hair and the other with the face of a girl.

,,Ikkaku? Yumichika? What the bloody hell are you two doing here? And why can't you just ring he bell?'' Ichigo hopped up.

,,We are truly sorry, but we didn't have enough time for that! Now, give us the tea, and no more problems will come up!'' the flamboyant shinigami said in the tone of a policeman.

,,Why should I give you my tea?'' the orange haired one questioned. He got the answer a second later, when another hole appeared on his house; this time on the roof. A huge, butterfly-like thing flow in.

,,GIVE IT TO ME! I NEED IT!'' the new arrival shouted and stretched his arm towards the cup full of tea, but Ikkaku blocked him immediately. This scene gave Ichigo the chance to look better at the face of the odd creature and state that it slightly reminded him of Sosuke Aizen.

,,HURRY UP AND DESTROY IT!'' Ikkaku shouted, not being able to hold on for much longer. Yumichika used Sakkaho to make the 'precious' liquid evaporate. It flew out of the window and so did Aizen.

* * *

,,So Aizen is out of tea and goes around the Real World to find himself some?'' Ichigo could not believe what he just said.

,,Yes, it was the tea to reduce him like this. He's an addict, unfortunately. His story is really sad: this nasty substance made his life hell: he lost his position, his friends, his love and finally his mind.'' Yumichika narrated the story with a tragic tone, and at the end his voice choked and he started weeping. Ikkaku wrapped his arms around him.

,,It's okay, babe, you don't have to be so concerned, I'll never-ever drink tea, I swear!''

At that point Ichigo felt like he was going to puke rainbows all over.

,,WHY IS THE WHOLE WORLD TURNING GAY? HOW WILL THE HUMAN RACE REPRODUCE LIKE THIS?''

Yumichika slapped Ikkaku hard on the nape.

,,You dumbass, we weren't alone!''

,,Whoops...'' he got hit another time. Our protagonist was still staring at them with a questioning look.

,,Anyway, you shouldn't be so intolerant, Ichigo-kun! This is the twenty-first century, eighty percent of people are homosexual, they just can't admit it to themselves!'' the boy walked towards him pointing a finger right on front of his face.

,,Let me make this clear: I. AM. NOT. GAY. Period.''

,,No one asked you such a thing... Anyway, let's get back to the story. Aizen still has the arrancar, but his Espada seemed to slip out of control. It's a strange phenomenon, it might be related to the fact that they are far stronger than the other arrancar.''

,,So you're saying the Espada... Ran off?'' Ichigo asked, forgetting about the topic before, for the sake of the mission.

,,Exactly. Some of them are waddling around Soul Society, we already captured number 10, 7 and 1.''

,,The strongest Espada too? You guys are amazing, you don't even need my help!'' the orange haired shinigami said with surprise.

,,Actually... he was sleeping.'' Ikkaku intervened in the conversation.

,,Yeah'' Yumichika continued ,,Also, number 7 was meditating and number 10 could easily be attracted by food.''

,,And where are the other seven?'' Ichigo asked.

,,That's the exact point. They are here, in the Wolrd of the Living!''

* * *

**Author's Notes: Finally managed to continue! I think this was enough OOC for the project ;) I thought about all the stuff I just HAD TO put in this (since I could put basically anything lol) and I concluded it was IkkaYumi, first. I have tons of other pairings too, though, so I'll make them slowly enter this braindead crap. **

**My eyes on ya**

**~NYE**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter five

Ulquiorra was sitting on a random roof in Karakura Town. He knew no one was around him; he could see everything, even in his human form. Somehow, he realized that Espada don't need gigais to move around normally in the Human World; their power gave them a body.

His green eyes tried to find something outstanding in the district. Since the houses were all almost alike, he needed some kind of reference point to find his way back to this place. There was a nice view of the stars, or whatever they were called.

He acted in a different way when he was alone. He even allowed himself to make facial expressions. This time, he wore an evil smirk. And he had a proper reason for it.

Because now he knew that everyone who he ever looked up to, was trash. Halibel was trash. Barragan was trash. Starrk was trash. And Kaname Tousen was trash too. And Ichimaru Gin. Even Aizen was trash. Because Ulquiorra had something they didn't have and never could.

All of them were gay. The lower Espada too. Even Grimmjow. And Yammy. They were all attracted to their same gender. But he wasn't. He knew perfectly who he was attracted too and he got no rejection from the individual.

He had something all of that annoying trash would only wish for; if they weren't as gay as the rainbow on top of it.

He had a girlfriend.

* * *

**Author's Notes: Short Ulquiorra-centered cliffhanger is short... But I revealed something, at least. **


	6. Chapter 6

Sixth chapter

Szayel slurped his ice-cream with boredom showing on his face. He was trying to guess what kind of substance could make the material blue, exactly like Grimmjow's hair, but when he realized what was the answer, he found it so simple, he was almost disappointed. He had no clue about where the other Espada were; however, he could feel by Starrk's, Barragan's and Zommari's reiatsu that they weren't in this world. Such a shame, he thought. He liked Starrk's company, he could piss him off until he got bored because he wouldn't care anyway. He even flirted with him once, but after getting no response, he simply walked away to look for some other _guy _to sleep with. Yes, he was gay too, if I didn't mention before. He tried to hide it first, but when he saw Grimmjow and his brother kissing right next to the meeting room (the most frequented place in Las Noches) he didn't bother anymore. He was kind of a headhunter when it came to one night stands: he literally tried to get screwed by as many people as he could. He already had several affairs with Nnoitra during their plot against Nelliel (he was not hard to get, considering that he Quinta had sexual needs like everyone and he hated women), sometimes visited Aaroniero (severely in the Shiba Kaien form!) and once accomplished to get into Grimmjows pants after the long process of getting him drunk.

He usually fucked with half Las Noches because he got bored, but now he didn't have anybody and his lab neither... He loved experimenting more than anything, it even came before sex, but there was serious competition between the two.

Then he finally made up a plan. He was going to try something new in this world: he would temporarily take the role of the seme. Now he just needed some cute, innocent human guy...

A sadistic smirk appeared on Szayel's face. A boy just passed by him. He was short and really thin, with pale skin and raven hair. His blue eyes shone with innocent pureness and his adorable face was lighted up by a wide smile.

Wait... He has already seen this guy. It was that quincy from last time... How did he get back here? Aizen kidnapped him...

Well, it didn't matter much for the pink haired scientist. He headed towards the boy and stood in front of him.

,,Cheers!'' the poor thing moved backwards.

,,S-sorry, do I know you?''

,,Aaawh, you forgot about me... What a shame! You look a bit different from when we first met... Where are your glasses? They make people look more intellectual, you know...'' he pushed his frames up proudly.

The guy's face enlightened.

,,Oh, I got it! You're messing me up with my brother,... sir! I'm truly sorry... Uryu's not aviable at the moment!''

,,You're not... the quincy?'' Szayel scratched his head.

,,I'm a quincy too, actually, but I'm Ishida Youkina! Pleased to meet you!'' the Espada realized that this boy didn't have a clue about who he was and how he met his brother.

,,Oh, I'm Szayel Aporro Grantz, really pleased to meet you, sweetheart! How's your brother? What's up with him?''

,,He's... Well... He's traveling at the moment... He went to the countryside so I can't call him either. Can I invite you to a coffee, Szayel-san?''

,,Of course, darling! It's a wonderful idea!'' he patted the quincy's twin's back as they walked towards the nearest coffee shop.

They had a long-long conversation. Szayel realized the teen wasn't stupid either, he was just... Innocent. The zenith of innocence. And this was just perfect for him.

,,And, Youkina-kun, where do you live?''

,,I'm currently staying at one friend of mine... His name is Inoue Orihime, she's a very kind person!'' This is double combo, the scientist thought. He was about to get the best specimen and the cutest uke. Now he just needed to get himself in the house.

,,That's lovely... I have nowhere to stay at the moment, I'm living in a hotel...''

,,You can come over any time, I think Orihime-san doesn't mind at all! Oh, and she'll let you stay there for the night too, if we're lucky!''

,,Oh thank you very much, darling! Such kindness, oh my god... I'll have to repay this somehow!'' Szayel blinked at Youkina who didn't get anything by that look.

After a few minutes they arrived at Orihime's house. The girl wasn't home, but she seemed like gone to shopping. The quincy twin quickly showed the scientist around. After that they sat down in the kitchen to drink something.

,,You're also a very kind person, Szayel-san!'' the boy smiled while the pink haired man was putting some water on.

,,And you're a very cute boy, Youkina-kun!'' he answered.

,,Why, thank you!''

,,And... You have a girlfriend yet? What do you think of Inoue-san?''

,,Well, she's nice and all, but she has a boyfriend already... She said he was going to cut her into small pieces even if she revealed his identity, I can't imagine what he would do if Orihime-san cheated on him!''

,,Wow... Cutting into small pieces... The boyfriend of Orihime Inoue... That's really... specific.''

,,Sorry?''

,,Nothing, nothing...'' Szayel muttered as he put the tea leaves into the hot water. Suddenly, one of the walls crashed down. Aizen entered this room too, in his release form.

,,GIMME THE TEA!'' both guys were screaming like little girls. The pink haired scientist felt less seme now.  
The monster like hollow-Aizen almost crashed into the two of them, when suddenly...

,,SANTEN KESSHUN!" a large shield appeared in front of Youkina and Szayel. Aizen ran off with the tea.

,,Are you hurt?'' was the first sentence of the orange haired girl.

,,I'm fine... Thank you... Anyway, hello there, Pet-sama!'' the scientist stood up in front of Orihime with a sadistic smirk.

,,Szayel Aporro Grantz?'' she asked in slight surprise.

,,You two... Know each other?'' Youkina said confused.

,,My my, what should I do with you now?'' the Espada asked, forgetting about the facade. He raised his hand towards the trembling girl, but a sword stopped him. A katana, actually, with green handle and a porcelain white hand holding it. And the owner of the hand was a depressed guy apparently around sixteen years with black hair and big, green eyes. He was wearing a matching green hat (with something weird underneath), a black t-shirt and a simple pair of jeans. There were green tear lines tracing from his eyes.

,,Dare to raise a hand upon her and you're dead, Grantz!''

,,Ulquiorra-kun!'' Inoue said, with a tone almost as annoying as the 'Kurosaki-kun' one.

,,Quarta, I didn't expect you here! I finally found a comrade, thanks Kami!''

,,I'm not your comrade. Not as long as you're trying to hurt **my** woman.'' Ulquiorra said with a killer gaze. Youkina observed the whole scene silently.

After all the fuss, Orihime made a room for Szayel too, leaded by her well-known kindness towards everyone.  
It made Ichigo wonder if he was still sane, when he saw all the people in the house the morning afterwards...

* * *

**Author's Notes: Uh, well, it was quite hard to make this chapter... I'm out of inspiration at the moment, I have more for my drabs (_No food for 'Hime (and other drabs) _Check 'em out!), on top of it, I just got my glasses... Egh. I'm gonna look like a nerd noobface from now on. Nah, doesn't matter. Glasses don't change someone's personality... Right? Sorry for writing personal stuff here... I just have to...**

**Anyway. Thank you for the reviews, even if my traffic graph is enough to see that I should continue this story. Two reasons. First: I barely post reviews or fave, I read tons of good stories I didn't fave/review just because I was lazy. Second: Unfinished stuff is so much friggin' annoying... I'm gonna end this even if it turns out crap. I don't care.  
**

**My eyes on ya.  
**

**~NYE  
**


	7. Chapter 7

Seventh chapter

Ichigo sighed. How could he expect something so stupid? He thought the Arrancar would take Ishida to Hueco Mundo or a secret underground place at least... Not a trash dump.  
,,In fact, that's where he belongs to" Ulquiorra said keeping up his tendency of calling everyone trash. He even did it with himself once.  
Anyway, the gang completed by Yoruichi, Ulquiorra, Szayel and Youkina gathered at Urahara's because the Flash Goddess finally localized the lost quincy. The landfill was at east of Karakura; it wasn't unreachable with shunpo. However Ichigo brought up a good question: why didn't Ishida go home before from there? The common opinion was that they kept him as captive, and that certain 'they' could only be Ichimaru Gin, Kaname Tousen and some lower Arrancar, since the Espada were scattered around the town and Aizen went crazy.  
Yes, that was still an upcoming problem. How to stop the mad tea-dependent hollow lord?

Ichigo had a plan for that. They would set up a tea trap and defeat him. He was aware of how strong Aizen was so he decided to go there himself.  
,,You just go get back Ishida!"  
,,Won't you get hurt, Ichigo-kun? I heard that Aizen is really badass!" Youkina said with a worried tone.  
,,Don't worry, Youki, I'm even more badass!" the orange haired boy grinned. Then he realized how did he just call the quincy twin and started to be afraid of himself.

The action started. Ichigo went to defeat Aizen and everyone else to save Ishida. The second group was guided by Yoruichi who had to switch to extra-slow mode so that the others could keep up with her. Ulquiorra was carrying Orihime bridal style, not caring about the others' opinions.

In the meanwhile, our protagonist was shunpoing to the biggest open area of Karakura he knew with a bag of tea and a pot of hot water in his hand. The place was a huge unused building site. He quickly put the leaves in the water.  
Everything happened just as planned. Aizen appeared with his ridiculous butterfly outfit on, screaming something about the tea being all his. Ichigo went bankai without hesitation.  
An amazing battle started. Even though the traitor was crazy, he was still strong as hell so it was very hard for the shinigami to dodge his hits.  
,,I can't keep this up" he thought ,,Even if I don't get hurt for a while, I'll never be able to attack him!"  
Aizen's speed was just surprising. He was even faster than Ulquiorra (who was very fast). Ichigo tried to get a Getsuga Tenshou together, but he failed. The butterfly man hit him while he was collecting reiatsu, making a huge bleeding cut on his chest.  
The boy felt the pain but he knew he couldn't give up if he didn't want to get even more hurt. After repeating this scene for the fifth time he knew he couldn't make it. He collapsed on the ground waiting for the lethal hit, when suddenly someone stopped Aizen's blade with his own.

,,Been long, ne, Sosuke?" Ichigo saw a familiar overbite-smirk.  
Something unexpected happened. Aizen's reiatsu started fading and he returned to his normal form. He was completely calm, even ignoring the tea.  
,,What did you do to your hair, Hirako-taichou?" the hollow lord almost sounded disappointed.  
,,I cut it, asshole. I did it on purpose to annoy you!"  
,,Such a waste!" Aizen smirked.  
,,You changed your appearance too, so shut up! How can you even see further than your nose without your glasses?  
,,I only had 1,5 myopia, taichou! Besides, I hate looking like the nerd you thought I was!"  
,,Even the nerd image is cooler than this... What's up with _your _hair, anyway? You look like a new rich bullfighter!"  
,,Yes? And YOU look like Brian Jones!"  
Ichigo just sat there on the ground, so confused about the situation to be able to forget his wounds (he wouldn't even notice dying of blood loss). The argue between Shinji and Aizen went on without a single blade out.  
,,Orange and green are really cool together!"  
,,Nah, too many colors, I prefer the royal pureness of clean white, with just one touch of color, like this dominant red on my belt, for example!"  
,,Oh gods, Sosuke, minimalism is so last-century! What's with that domination, by the way?"  
,,Well, I dominate over everything. I'm God. Don't forget it."  
,,You're too much of a pussy to have god syndrome, Sosuke! I'm way cooler than you!" Aizen stepped closer to the vizard after this sentence, cupping his shocked face into his hands.  
,,Come on, we both know about the manifestation of my _domination_..." Ichigo hopped up.  
,,YOU DON'T MEAN IT THAT WAY, DO YOU?!" both men stared at him.  
,,I mean what I said." Aizen said.  
,,None of your business." Shinji said.  
,,DEAR GOD HELP ME!" the boy shouted while running to get away from this nightmare.  
The vizard and the hollow king stood there in silence. Then Aizen talked.  
,,I don't understand why is he running that way. I'm over here."

* * *

**Author's Notes: Short chapter after a long chapter. I'm proceeding with my plan to put all my OTPs here. Hope ya liked the AiShin reference. I had to turn the guy back to normal, however. Don't worry, he'll go rehab anyway ;) Next chapter is the other group's turn. I didn't develop the yaoi part enough yet, but I'll do that in ninth chap maybe. I'm afraid this crap will turn out a lot longer than expected. **

**Thanks for the countless views. Another thing: when I said I didn't want reviews, I lied. **

**Eyes on ya**

**~NYE**


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